What I Want

I’m very sad. I wanted to wrap up my blog in a lovely Christmas present. It would have been a slide show – which would mostly be for the grandmas. And a song, which would have been for you.

Maybe you’ve heard it. It’s by a band called The Rescues. And it’s called, “All That I Want for Christmas (Is to Give My Love Away)”. It featured on Grey’s Anatomy a while back, and I’ve played it over and over since then and it plays in my head every minute of this wonderful season. Some years I can’t find that “It’s really about family and being together” joy because I’m bogged down by all the money you have to spend but don’t really have. This year, literally, all that I want is what the song says. I haven’t done it in a big way like I wanted to. I spent too much on my children to stop world hunger or to bring  clean water to third world nations. I failed in that way.

But, still, it’s my anthem. I put coins in the shiny red bucket when I pass. I promise to smile at you no matter how long the checkout line or how grouchy you look at me when I squeeze by you in the aisle. I swear I’ll be perfectly, ecstatically delighted and at peace just being with my family, even if it’s in a hospital room where Grandpa’s recovering from pneumonia. I’m thinking of the New Year and how I want to work harder on that clean water thing. And every moment I’m trying to be more like the person who gives far more than they receive.

I can’t give you the song. I couldn’t find a way to get permission to use it in a slideshow on my blog. You can find it on You Tube, but the videos I found with it aren’t very true to the way it makes me feel. Still, if it’s possible – here’s some of my love. I’ve been given so much of it, I have a lot to share. And I wish I could pass it out like candy canes.

For what it’s worth, Merry Christmas from Me and Mine, to Yours.