I’m writing about how I didn’t even realize Zac and Vanessa broke up until Lori told me so in a comment on my blog. And I don’t know how that’s possible. And don’t even get me started on Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johansson. I didn’t even know they were together, and now they too have called it quits. I could tell you it’s because I was too focused on cancer, but I’m pretty sure it’s because I was still in mourning over Courtney Cox and David Arquette.
I’m also going to tell you about all the pictures of Katie Holmes and Michelle Williams I’ve been perusing today because my sisters were trying to help me enjoy the idea of a short hair cut. Last month I decided to follow some advice to cut my hair short in order to make the chemo effects less traumatic. My mom and sisters – I gotta say pretty gladly – jumped at the chance to offer moral support by cutting theirs as well and keeping it short until mine begins to grow out again when the process is over. I didn’t love any of the pictures I saw because I was pretty sure they didn’t come with celebrity faces, celebrity dollars, or celebrity ability to make every style look on purpose.
While Jaylena cut my hair, I told her she was doing a great job, and she said, “But you hate it?” And I cried, “But I hate it!” But I didn’t actually cry with tears and such. I was pretty brave and the only freak-out moment came when one side was short and the other still had some long pieces, and I wanted to scream at her to STOP THE CUTTING! But the absurdity of keeping those few long strands kept me sane, and I didn’t scream that, and I made it to the end without freaking out again.
The thing is, I wasn’t really nervous about cutting my hair. I was nervous about everything else, and the hair was just a sign of it all.
**Tangled spoilers ahead**
My boys and I saw Disney’s Rapunzel movie, Tangled, together with my parents when it came out. I adored it – I think I told you that – but I cried a little more than I might have normally because the hair parts were just so poignant. You know how her hair glows and is all magical and healing when it’s long? Like magic sunshine? Then it gets cut in the end – I won’t tell you how, in case you don’t want spoilers but just had to keep reading anyway. But then when it’s cut, the magic turns out to still be there.
When we got home I said something about the poignancy and my tears. I said something about wishing I could have her long hair or wishing I had hair that could heal me or just wishing I didn’t have to cut it – something like that, and we can’t quite remember what it was that I said. But Michael turned to me and tugged the end of my hair and said, “The sunshine was inside her.”
And that’s why he’s the best person I could possibly go through all this with. And that’s why I think finding true love and holding onto it for-absolutely-ever is the best gift God has given us and the best gift we can give each other. And that’s why celebrity breakups break my heart.